i was rollin on her like bob the builder
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
