1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
i think i have herpe
just one?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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