my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize