Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Randomize
