So drunk, too bad you don't want this
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
