Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize