it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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