weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
