I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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