I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
you didnt know i had herpes?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
