Small penises have feelings too.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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