do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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