i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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