Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
