I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize