Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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