take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize