Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
