she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
