ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Someone signed my nipple.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
