he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize