Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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