THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Help. Why am I so naked?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
