My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize