Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
