8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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