So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You pole danced in your parka.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
