Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
