I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
