Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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