their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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