yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
