laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
True strength comes from lack of pants
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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