when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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