This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
