Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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