then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
