Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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