Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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