she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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