the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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