are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
