hell yes lets make some ravioli
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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