the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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