ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
