legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
ttyl tear gas
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
