so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
