i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
