Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
