bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
