No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
